June 02, 2012

Places to go, people to see!

Hey everyone, I am introducing a new feature called PLACES TO GO, PEOPLE TO SEE where i will will tell you about an event you can go to and a person you should know. So the place to be on the 9th and 10th of June if you are in Abuja,  is a promising garage sale (see flier) and the person to meet is friend and brother (from another mother), Ibrahim Suleiman. I love his poems and this one in particular is tasteful, no pun intended. He calls it Holocaust Kitchen...enjoy this offering and see you at the garage sale!

I once knew a terribly good cook
Who very seriously his job he took
He had a ready smile
And a big, hearty laugh
He cooked with panache and style,
Going the extra mile and a half
But he was big as a whale
And oh, twice as mean
And if they could, a horrible tale
Of where they've been
The food would tell...
He guts the fish, without as much as a death wish
Whipped the cream because they wouldn't scream
Like a sergeant from 'nam, he grilled the ham
Knead the dough and beat the eggs
[Oh, if only they had legs]
Stuffed the turkey and plucked the chicken,
All this did the jolly heathen
He roast the beef and without skipping a beat
Went all out and minced the meat
With gusto he pounds yams and mashed potatoes.
Feeling happy and proud down to his toes
He blend the plump tomatoes
He froze the cream [a firm favorite for him]
He put the squeeze on the lemon
Giggling like an impish demon
He racked the spices,
Punishing them for their prices
He joyfully banged the saucepans
Saying they were lucky he couldn't dance
Telling them it was for their sakes,
He tossed the poor pancakes
He sloshed the vinegar
Until it was rather sober
Stuck a large apple in the roast pig's mouth
Because he knew it couldn't eat it!
he was a great cook, believe it
And they always looked good enough to eat
When questioned about his ways
He would laugh loud and say;
"To win the hunger races,
You gotta put the food through the paces!"



  1. Awww...I laughed at some lines and enjoyed every bit of it.

    Excellent, fun and a beautiful read. (Y)

  2. U learnt well, bruv! :D!! Still got a few up my sleeves, Ed-ho, heheheheheh!


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